Skip to content

Sighs of relief as big jobs drop avoided

Painting of the Blue Cubicle Gallery, to show how it resembled a wayside portable toilet. Closure of the gallery led to sighs of relief that only one job had been lost.
The Blue Cubicle Gallery
Painting by Brod Stayers

There were sighs of relief from the Thanetian corner of the South East’s arts economy this week when unemployment in this vital sector rose by just a single digit, writes Artie Flannell. The fall in those at work came when the innovative but short-lived Blue Cubicle Gallery sadly locked its door for the last time.

Art entrepreneur Ned Tournip, owner of the gallery, which was positioned in a lay-by on the A299, admitted that his experimental mini-exhibition space had not allowed for visitors’ conditioned responses when confronted with a structure that resembled a portable w.c.

Tournip’s intention had been to create an easily-installed and highly mobile individualised space within which potential buyers of original art could closet themselves into an engaging relationship with the work and make purchases undisturbed by others.

‘No one spent a penny in the Blue Cubicle’

It was anticipated that visitors would enter the cubicle, close the door behind them, receive a price list from shop manager Matt Scumbling – the sole member of staff and occupier of the only seat in the gallery – before browsing an array of monoprints inspired by the rendering of flatulence in Japanese He-Gassen art of the early Edo period.

“The concept was simple but, sadly, it didn’t work,” said Tournip. “The problem was that as soon as people opened the door, they would apologise to Matt and quickly shut it again, exclaiming, ‘Sorry! I didn’t know it was occupied!’”

Tournip repeated Margate artist Tracey Emin’s assertion that “commerce follows art”, ruefully adding his own comment that “sadly, however, in this case no one spent a penny in the Blue Cubicle. “

“All is not lost, however,” declared an optimistic Tournip.  “The monoprints, by local artist Merzi de Bris, will now be rehoused in my online gallery space in a solo show to be called ‘Pulling One Off’. And as for my ex-manager Matt, I’m confident that with his MA in ‘Mesmerizing the Viewer’ behind him, the art world will not leave him in vacant mode for long.”

Portrait of the artist Merzi de Bris
Merzi de Bris
See more of her in Pulling One Off

LIFTING THE LID ON A PUBLIC CONVENIENCE

Published inartyjokesFlatulistings